Jennifer thought that the busyness of work would keep her mind off Richie, but it didn’t. She was mooning and pouting and finally so disgusted with herself, she sought out one of her friends to give her a reality check. She logged onto the board and chatted which helped, and she was able to get some of her backlog of work done. Jen spent a good deal of time whining to Stephanie about Richie, but once she got all the “poor me” out of her system, she felt loads better. Smiling, she said her goodbyes and logged off the board.
Minutes later, her email pinged. Stephanie wrote her, offering to come out and help her out of her funk. A funk, Jen thought, that she should be able to get herself out of alone. A funk she just had to shut up and get over. There was absolutely no reason for her to be so upset and distracted. Jen wrote back that it wasn’t necessary, but if she didn’t feel better by the weekend, she would take her friend up on the offer.
Smiling, she closed that message, and stared, slack-jawed at the one that had just arrived. It was from her ex-husband. She was tempted to read it, to see what he wanted, but if it was anything she needed to deal with (though she had no earthly idea what that could possibly be) he could get in touch with her through her lawyer. It felt good to click the little ‘x’ to delete the message without reading it, and tried to put him out of her mind, but Jen couldn’t help the direction her thoughts took.
In the beginning, things with her ex-husband were really good. The couple would go to dinner, to the theater, out with friends, or just hang out together. Their sex life was good, great actually, and they were always willing to try new things; always in synch with each other. Then, about two years before they split, things changed.
He started working late, and “forgetting” to call. She knew he was working on a new account, so cut she him some slack. Then came the business trips that came with his promotion. A few days here and there, then all of a sudden there was a week-long conference in Arizona. He didn’t call all week, claiming to be too busy. They traded emails and IMs, but they were impersonal and cold. When he was finally home, her ex was also impersonal and cold. They grudgingly went out with friends, and put on a good show for them, but behind closed doors, things were hard. They were roommates inhabiting the same house, but each of them had their own lives. The time apart became easier and easier to bear, and Jennifer actually started looking forward to when he would go away.
She tried to tell herself that it was her ex’s shortcomings, not hers that were the problem. She knew though, that she gave him the power to hurt her when she got too wrapped up in him, and she must share some of the blame, after all, she was in that marriage, too.
When Jennifer found out he was cheating on her, she wasn’t really surprised. Hurt, sure, but not really surprised. What did surprise her was his feeling of entitlement. He felt entitled to the affair…and her money. He felt that it was her fault he had to go elsewhere for the tenderness and love he craved, and she should be so grateful to be rid of someone she obviously didn’t love, that she should gladly pay him off.
Not fucking likely.
She used a healthy portion of a year’s salary to pay for the winningest divorce lawyer in Massachusetts. Claudia Despres made sure that her ex got nothing but his clothes and fishing trophies. What was Jennifer’s stayed Jennifer’s. The court battle was long and harsh, and Jen couldn’t believe some of the things this man, someone who promised to love her forever, spewed hatefully through his own lawyer. Jen was so devastated by his betrayal, that she decided there in the courtroom, as her husband’s attorney told the court how she was a neglectful, hateful woman, that she was never going to let a man get that far under her skin, that far into her life, that his actions would dictate her emotions.
Then she met Rich.
Then she fell in love with him, and all her good intentions flew out the window. She didn’t tie her happiness to him, but she fell hard all the same, and was so wrapped up in him, that she found herself overly emotional at the little things he did or didn’t do, and it was driving her nuts.
Richie never gave her any reason to believe he was anything other than devoted to her. In word and in deed, he was utterly, completely smitten and in love with her. She knew that. It was the only thing that kept her from running screaming in fear from their relationship. She knew by the little gifts he sent, and the flowers and cards that showed up every couple of days, that he was still thinking of her, and going the extra mile for her.
Then her birthday came.
That was the week that Richie had come to visit her in Boston and Jen was over the moon. Before she could ask him what he had planned for her birthday, he told her that he had to leave the night before her birthday to do something for Heather. He didn’t even mention Jen’s birthday. The fact that Jennifer and his ex shared a birthday was something they joked about in Southampton, when David accused Richie of using Jennifer as a substitute for his ex. She had brought it up, remarking that it was something she and his ex had in common, and she joked that he had celebrated Heather’s birthday for a dozen years, he should be sure to remember hers.
It looked like she was wrong.
That was really what started her on her spiral. She didn’t say anything to Richie because she didn’t want to whine about something stupid. The absolute last thing Jennifer wanted to do was come off as a whiny, clingy dipshit.
She was startled out of her reverie by Dionne and friends. Keep shining, keep smiling / Knowing you can always count on me / For sure / That’s what friends are for
Jennifer laughed. “Hey Cheryl,” she said by way of answer. “Thanks for calling, you caught in the middle of a pity party, and I did NOT want to stay.”
“I just wanted to check in on you, sweetie. I read your posts on the board today, and you had a really BAD day.” Cheryl had spent some time on the board with Richie as well, and knew that Jen was going to need a sympathetic ear.
“So, spill, what did you get Jennifer for her birthday?” Cheryl PM’d to Richie on the board. “She isn’t offering anything. I asked her about your birthday visit, but she won’t spill any details.”
“Her birthday?” Richie sent back. When the hell was her birthday?
“Yes, silly, don’t play coy with me, I know she told you her birthday was the same as Heather’s, and it was last week. So...what did you get?”
Cheryl waited for long minutes with no response from Richie. “Oh shit,” she said out loud. Surely Richie didn’t forget? Maybe he did.
“Richie, did you forget Jen’s birthday?” she typed.
“Uh, yeah. Shit. Cheryl, I’m gonna call you.” Richie felt like dog shit. He was so concerned with making sure Ava got to do what she wanted with Heather that he completely forgot about Jen. Oh, this was not good.
“Why didn’t’ she say anything to me?” Richie demanded.
“You’re kidding, right?” Cheryl answered. “Have you met her? She’s not going to try to make you feel badly.”
Richie groaned. That made it worse. At least if she called him on it, he could be contrite and try to make it up to her. But now? She’s not even going to mention it? “God,” he said, “what can I do?”
“What’s your schedule like? All she really wants is just to see you.”
“That can be arranged.”
“Yeah, my day pretty much sucked, but I’m okay. Well not okay, but getting there. Steph offered to come out to drink with me, and let me cry on her,” Jennifer laughed, “but I’m not in that bad a way yet. You know, you guys are just wonderful, checking up on me like this.”
“Sweetie, we’re friends, that’s what we do – we help each other.” Cheryl smiled, thinking of the ‘help’ she gave Richie today.
“Well thank you,” Jennifer said, feeling better.
“Don’t even mention it,” Cheryl answered. “I just wanted to check in, make sure you were okay.”
“Like I said, I’m getting there,” Jennifer said. “I’m going to try to get my work done so I don’t have to work all night, then go home and try to relax.”
“Sounds good. You know you can call me anytime, right?” Cheryl asked.
“I know. Thanks. I love ya, girlfriend.”
“Right back atcha.”
That night, just about when Jennifer was ready for bed, her cell rang. Karen Carpenter’s beautiful voice singing through the room: I fell in love with you before the second show / Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear / But you're not really here it's just the radio…
Sniffling back a sob at the bittersweet words she chose for his ring tone, she cleared her throat and answered the phone.
“Hey, baby,” Jennifer said.
“Jennifer, darlin’, how are you?”
With a growl, Jennifer let go of almost all the bile that built up over past several days – she was still determined not going to whine about her birthday. Ava and her plans came first, she knew that. Jen told him every other little thing that pissed her off, from the horrendous trip into town, to losing her train pass, to the phantom deleted message from her ex, to the people who were acting like idiots at work. She was in desperate need of cheering up.
“Apparently, I’m such a basket case, that Stephanie was ready to come out this weekend to try to help me cheer up.”
“I wish it was me coming out there to cheer you up,” Richie said softly.
Jennifer agreed. “I just wish I’d snap out of the funk. I just miss you,” she said, then winced. She sounded whiny to her ears. “I’m sorry, baby,” she said.
“For missing me? Don’t be sorry, sweetheart.” He chuckled. “I’d be sorry if you didn’t miss me.”
“You know what I mean. I’m being silly. So tell me, how’s Ava?”
Richie shook his head. She still wasn’t going to say anything. Well, he’d fix the oversight soon enough. He chattered about his daughter for a few minutes, then took a deep breath. “Will you let me do something for you?” he asked.
Jennifer was surprised at the abrupt change of subject. Was he trying to get off the phone? “Uh, sure, I guess so, Rich. What is it?”
“Given your shit commute, and that you lost your train pass, will you let me hire you a car – just for the rest of the week. You need to be able to relax and not worry about the train or running late or driving home – I just want to pamper you a little.”
Jennifer was silent on the other end of the line. “That’s all it is? You just want me to relax?” she finally asked.
“Of course. That, and there MAY be a little surprise in the back seat for you tomorrow.”
Jennifer laughed. “What kind of surprise?”
“Well,” Richie said, “I was thinking we could have a sort of date on Friday night and I can send you a little something to bring to the date.”
“Oh yeah? Like what?” Jennifer asked.
“You’ll just have to wait and see,” Richie said. “What are you up to tonight?”
“I had some work to do, but I decided to bag it. I have yet another early morning India call and need to go get some sleep. You know,” Jennifer joked, “it would be easier if I just went to India for a month.”
“You aren’t going to do that, are you?” The thought of his Jen flying halfway around the world made his heart stop. He realized that was what she must feel like when he goes away. He didn’t like it at all.
“Not likely – not yet anyway. Probably not until February, if at all. We’ll see. Let me tell you, I’m going to need copious amounts of Valium and Xanax to get through a 17 hour flight.”
“Can you even find a doctor to prescribe that much? You’re better off getting up early.”
“Okay, if you say so. So, are you going to tell me about this surprise, or no?”
“Nope,” Richie said. “You are just going to have to wait and see.
“The car will be here for 5:30 tomorrow?”
“Yep,” Richie said. “Just tell the driver when you need him, and he’ll be there. He’s at your disposal every morning and afternoon all week.”
“You are the best, do you know that?” Jennifer was smiling the first real smile she made since he left.
“So I’ve been told,” Richie joked. “Alright, I’ll let you get some sleep, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”
“You sure will talk to me tomorrow,” Jennifer answered.
“Sounds like a good deal. Alright, baby,” Richie said, “I’ll talk to you later. I love you, you know.”
“I know, and I love you too.”
“Bye, darlin’.”
“Bye, Rich.”
0 comments:
Post a Comment