Jennifer blinked in surprise at the latest PM from a guy calling himself “Billy the Kidd”. That was a good one. How far, indeed, was she willing to go? If she went all in, she could end up looking like a fool. Or she could end up with the opportunity of a lifetime. Either way, she was anonymous on this board, so did it really matter?
Jennifer had joined “T’s Place” on a whim. She was looking for a new Bon Jovi community to hang out in, having tired of the snarkiness of Topix, and this seemed like just the place. The administrator, a woman who went by ‘T’, basically said she had no patience for assholes or KoolAid drinkers, and that suited Jennifer just fine. She created a login under her alter ego’s name: The Goddess Hathor. Jennifer had been writing Jovi fan fiction under that moniker for a little over a year, and wanted the chance to meet some other authors and network with some other fans. T’s Place seemed like as good a place as any to try.
There were several women on the board that Jennifer recognized as fellow authors, and she knew she had landed on the right place. There didn’t seem to be any of the craziness that had plagued other boards she had tried.
Well, there was Billy: the lone male on the board. He seemed like a normal enough guy, if not a little self-centered and arrogant, but hey, it could be an act. Like everyone else Jennifer had encountered in the FanFic/ChatBoard world, people who used aliases typically had a whole persona to go along with it. This could just be part of Bill’s. For a month, he’d been on the board, not really joining any of the conversation too much, but piping up once in a while.
He had tried to start up a more personal relationship with T, the moderator on the board. He showed real concern for her, too, when she told everyone she had to have surgery to remove some cancerous mass they found on her tongue. He seemed very nice.
Now he was trying, albeit not very hard, to convince Jennifer that he knew Richie Sambora. Richie. The man who had lived in her dreams for more years than she could count. The inspiration for some of her best writing. Yeah, right. He told her that he knew Richie and thought she would be a good match for him.
PM FROM THE GODDESS HATHOR TO BILLY THE KIDD :
Uh, huh, I'm at an actual loss for words. That's a pretty deep fucking rabbit hole there, Bill.
Just so I'm crystal clear on this (this convo is better than coffee for shaking out the cobwebs, btw) you are telling me that you think, Jesus, I can't believe I'm typing this, that I would be a good match for Richie Sambora? The guy in my siggie and avie. And not only that, but you actually directed him to my stories? What'd I ever do to piss you off, that you'd do that?
PM FROM BILLY THE KIDD TO THE GODDESS HATHOR:
I'm sorry. Are you saying you didn't want him to read your stuff? Well, shit, don't you think he has a right to, it is about him after all.
And, yes, we are talking about Richie Sambora.
Although, I am wondering why you aren't having any trouble believing me.
PM FROM THE GODDESS HATHOR TO BILLY THE KIDD :
Bill, there's a difference between wondering if the people about whom I write read my stuff and KNOWING they will (or are, have, whatever). BIG difference.
And uh, you have no idea whether I believe you or not, because I haven't sorted that out yet myself. I was just trying to sort out what exactly you were saying. Forgive me for sounding a little shell shocked.
I'll let you in on a little secret. I have an issue with people, Bill. I tend to believe them, no matter what they tell me. Naive I know, but it's part of who I am. I'm very trusting, and it's burned me more times than I can count.
Here's my dilemma. I want to believe you.
Not only because I'd like to think that you wouldn't come on here and fuck with a stranger like that. I'd like to think that the actual concern you showed for T was indicative of the kind of person you are. No, I want to believe you because I like the story you're telling. A lot, actually.
So, I guess I have to decide whether to follow you into the rabbit hole, or to drop a big ol' boulder on it once you've slipped inside...
What a headcase. Did he really think that she’d just up and believe him without being the least bit skeptical?
PM FROM BILLY THE KIDD TO THE GODDESS HATHOR:
No, please don't put a boulder on the hole once I slip down it. I have shows to do in a few days.
What?
PM FROM THE GODDESS HATHOR TO BILLY THE KIDD :
Wait, wait, wait, wait, hold the fucking phone.
"I have shows to do in a few days."
Exactly who the fuck are you?
Jennifer was beside herself. No way was he going to tell her he was...
Holy Fuck.
PM FROM BILLY THE KIDD TO THE GODDESS HATHOR:
I just kind of thought you knew who I was. Since you didn't ask how I knew Richie. But, I'm JBJ. Don't freak out on me and out me to the rest of the board. Please.
And, please, stay calm and breathe. No, I'm not being all arrogant rock star on you...I'm just guessing you'll handle it about as well as T did.
He just told her that he was Jon Bon Jovi.
Well, she sorta knew that already. He had been around the boards for a while, and chatted up T, the admin. She said that he was Jon; but Jen didn’t really believe it. Not until this moment. And even then, she wasn’t exactly sure.
Did she really believe that shit?
She wanted to. She wanted to believe that this man was really Jon, and he really did think that she would be good for his best friend. He let Jennifer know that T, the moderator on the board, knew who he was because he called her, and she had him sing a few bars of Prayer to her.
Given that information, far too easy to check out and find out if he was lying, Jennifer was inclined to believe him. Seeing as how fiction was a big part of her life, and a good story never hurt anyone, and adding in the fact that she was a trusting soul, she told him she’d go all the way.
PM FROM THE GODDESS HATHOR TO BILLY THE KIDD :
Holy shit!
You wouldn't lie about something I could so easily check. I choose to believe you, Jon.
Um, well 'hi'. My real name is Jennifer. Jennifer Petruzzo. And *whew* I'd love to talk to Richie.
Guess I'm right behind you in that rabbit hole. Uh, does he just want to call me? Or do an actual meet?
Jon sat back at his desk and smiled. She had just a little reluctance and a little doubt, but she seemed willing to believe him. He offered to call her and sing to her, like he had to do with T. T. He smiled wider at the thought of her. When he joined the board, he got into a verbal sparring match with her. In his defense, he was trying to tell her who he was, and she just plain wouldn’t believe him. He got her to come around though, and he had a feeling that would be one of the best decisions he had ever made.
This was going to be another. This woman, Hath, well, Jennifer, seemed just like the kind of normal fan-but-not-too-much-so woman that Richie needed, even if it was just for a short romp. He had no illusions about happily-ever-after; he figured if he could get Richie to meet a normal woman, see what one was like, then he'd be able to make better decisions about his own life.
Jon got Hath to tell him her full name: Jennifer Elizabeth Maria Teresa Petruzzo. He was surprised that when he suggested she and Richie meet at the Boston shows, she turned him down. Flat. She suggested Jon talk to Richie first, make sure he really wanted to meet her.
PM FROM BILLY THE KIDD TO THE GODDESS HATHOR:
Um. Just how freaked would you be if I told you he's ALREADY read your story, and asked if I'd be willing to tell you who I was so that I could set up a meet?
Now, that's not what I'm saying...exactly. It depends on how freaked you'd be.
I mean, why else would I just jump up and tell you who I was and offer up Richie as a blind date on a damn silver platter? It's not like I said..."Oh jeez, tonight I'm gonna set Rich up on a date, let's pull a name out of a hat and see just who the lucky lady will be. Ah, well. Jennifer, come on down...you're the next contestant on 'Let's find a date for the King of Swing'.
I mean, really, did ya think I wouldn't check with my bro before I did this?
Jon rolled his eyes. Yeah, like he would have gone through all this if he HADN’T talked to Richie first. Jennifer was freaked out. Came right out and said so. That made Jon laugh. She was not putting on an act, he could tell. He could also tell that Jennifer wasn’t quite convinced that this was on the up-and-up.
He grinned evilly. He had one more thing to tell her.
PM FROM BILLY THE KIDD TO THE GODDESS HATHOR:
Number or actual meet?
He said that was up to you.
He said that if you wouldn't be too embarrassed by what you wrote about him that he sure would like to meet you. He said that you were damn close on some of your...uh...details in your stories...and he wants to know if he's ever....uh...if you....uh. Hell, if you're someone that should know first hand.
Now, I'm done playing Cupid. The diaper isn't a good look for me, although the bow and arrow are pretty dashing. Let me know what you're comfortable with and I'll let him know.
Good night.
~JBJ
Jennifer let out a little scream. Holy shit, he read her stuff. And she was right about some of the details? That was just too much.
PM FROM THE GODDESS HATHOR TO BILLY THE KIDD :
Yeah, I'm a little freaked. This is a lot to take in. I'll feel better once I've slept on it.
I'll be a bit embarrassed, but hell I would love to meet him again. I met him once in Cali during his solo stuff. I'm the smart ass from Boston. And no, I have no reason to "know" anything about er, THAT; I just know what I like, and have a way with words
Um, either ask him to email me, or you can give him my cell number. 617-555-7424 and we'll sort something out, no bow-and-arrow intervention necessary. *gulp* Down the rabbit hole all the way.
Thanks for making me laugh with the diaper bit, though now dammit, I have that image in my head.
Good Night.
~ Jennifer
Jennifer shut down her computer before she could do something else stupid. Like write him back and tell him to hell yeah set up the meet. No, she thought to herself, this was better. Pass along the phone number and see if he calls. He probably won’t,” she thought to herself.
Jon fired off an e-mail before heading to bed.
FROM: frontman@bj.com
TO: wingman@bj.com
SUBJECT: Goddess
617-555-7424
And her name is Jennifer
~ J